So I haven’t updated in awhile but I guess not a whole lot has happened that’s worth updating or is appropriate for the internets. As many of you know, I flew back from Brisbane to Sydney so I could be with the few friends I made here on my birthday as opposed to being alone and trying to make new friends in another new city. This was good and bad for a few reasons. I had a FANTASTIC birthday for starters. Me and a bunch of friends went to this nice Italian restaurant by the Rocks, a more historic part of Sydney that almost reminds me of a cross between Quincy Market and Beacon Hill. Afterwards, we went to Kings Cross, the Red Light District of Sydney, where we proceeded to get drunk and have a lot of fun. Though I wish I could have spent my birthday with my friends back home, this was definitely not one to forget and I had an amazing night.
The downside to coming back here is that I had cut my traveling a little short and I still don’t feel ready to be back in the busy city of Sydney where I slowly watch my money drain away without any of the satisfaction I had while traveling. I know I need to find a place to live and its really difficult to find anything that isn’t either a shit hole, in the middle of nowhere, or stupid expensive. I’m flying blind here and it’s very overwhelming. Also, the group I hang out with consists of this one girl, Emma, and 2 guys, Chris and Ollie, and we would all love to find a place together, but it gets a little trickier when you’re looking for 4 people instead of one or two.
This also brings up the whole job crisis. I still have enough money that I’m not having a panic attack at what I’ve spent (and I wouldn’t have spent what I have on anything else in the world) but I feel like I need to get a job before I’m completely broke. I’ll be honest with you, I haven’t put any effort into this yet. Again, it’s overwhelming because it’s a lot more complicated than in the states. I need to completely remake my resume (again I feel like I’m flying blind here) and on top of that, since I’m clueless about where to live I don’t even know where to start looking.
I don’t know what it is that’s making these two tasks that sound so simple cause me so much stress, but it is. A part of it might be that I just don’t want to live in Sydney. I don’t feel like I’m in Australia when I’m here. I just feel like I’m in any city anywhere in the world. Part of why I wanted to come all the way to Australia was to have new experiences and live in places I haven’t necessarily lived before. Don’t get me wrong, Sydney is really cool, but I’m starting to think it’s just not the right city for me. There is no doubt in my mind after spending over 2 weeks on the beach essentially when I was traveling that I am NOT a beach person and never will be. I was born a city girl and will die one. I just don’t think Sydney is the city for me.
This all sort of culminated last night in the bathroom of the bar with my friend Emma when me met a woman from Canberra who started talking to us about jobs and Australia and where to live and it dawned on me (again it was one of those moments I felt really dumb for not coming up with on my own) but maybe I should leave Sydney and try things out somewhere else. Again, this is one of those things like when I decided to travel for a little bit that only has just come into thought for me, so stay tuned for updates.
They say you can’t run away from your problems, and I don’t think I came here because I was running away from things (though there definitely are things I was trying to escape when I decided to come here) but that statement holds a lot of truth for me now. I don’t know where I’m going on this adventure of mine but I need to learn to just stop and breathe. I’m only 23 years old and I’m only 4 weeks into this great journey. Again, I wish I had the natural ability to chill out and go with the flow, but that’s just not how I work. I just jumped into this whole Australia thing and it’s hard for me to learn to just see what happens. My dad likes to tell a story about how when I was little and started playing soccer in the first grade I joined in the middle of the season because I needed to watch the game and learn how it all works before I just jumped in. That’s a very good explanation for how I like to try to live my life (control issues much?). The season just started here and I’m not only learning the rules as I go, but I feel like I’m playing without a coach.
Well that was QUITE the long post but it had been awhile. I hope you’re all doing well. I’m hoping to get my phone sorted out today and get a data plan with a different provider and when I do you will all get txts and bbms and pictures from me. Wish me luck on all fronts because I feel like I need it now more than ever….